Death Metal Tattoos: part 2

I wish I knew what this was, I really do. It looks like a totem pole of demons? With some kind of weird scarred-out blob in the middle. Is it a tribal-mutant batman logo? AND DO YOU SEE THE SCRATCHED UP FETUS ON HIS ELBOW? I mean really, how could you miss that? I don't even know what the stuff on his forearm is. If anyone can help decipher this, please let me know! I was staring at this guy for ages trying to figure it out.



I wish I knew what was on his back, too. You can see a bit of it poking out. I bet it's incredible.

The Crow

I haven't gotten a tattoo in a year, and have been feeling the itch. I have an appointment for this upcoming Wednesday. I decided to get two big crows with lightning bolts, they'll probably on my ribs, unless I wuss out. It's kind of a memorial tattoo for my dad, but not totally. Anyway, I'll post pictures and you guys can feel free to make fun of them as much as you want. In anticipation of my appointment, I decided to do some looking around for terrible crow tattoos. I found a lot.

Full disclosure: I was really into The Crow when I was a teenager. Here's a photo of me being totally awesome when I was 13 or 14.

I don't have any ridiculous makeup on in that photo, but I definitely went to school made-up like the crow. The movie was filmed in my hometown (Wilmington, NC) and I went on a pilgrimage to see where Brandon Lee died. I listened to the soundtrack to the movie every day. I still really enjoy the movie. Regardless of my history with the movie, my crow tattoo idea has nothing to do with the movie The Crow. These people's tattoos do. There are so many sweet crow images out there, I don't know why they picked these out....

So here you go. Awful crow tattoos!


I think this crow is supposed to be on fire? It just looks blobby to me.


This is supposed to be the Crow logo, but it's not executed well...


This one too. Plus! Bonus barbed wire armband! I love seeing terrible versions of the same thing. (See my zombie jesus and wizard posts for more)


Crow mask + tribal + cross = goldmine!


Scarred Kanji + flaming crow = bigger goldmine!



I don't understand the spacing and sizing on this. It looks like the tattoos just got slapped on completely randomly. Also the little spritzes of red and yellow are a real nice touch. What is the black blob on the left? Can anyone tell?


skldfskdjf Brandon Lee does not look like that!


And he really, really does not look like this!!!

I hope you enjoyed this confessional edition of awful tattoos. Check back next week to make fun of my crow tattoo!

sports and tattoos, a terrible mix...

Now I am a die hard Yankees fan and will never deny my devotion to the team. I however have always had an apprehension to getting a team related tattoo not because I dislike the team in some way, but mostly because sports related tattoos are normally god awful. They are almost always poorly executed and have stupid subject matter if it's not a specific logo. Here are some real stinkers I've found on my search around our faithful internet.




Since I mentioned I am a Yankees fan, it's only fair to start with them. I've been to enough games in my day to see some really terrible Yankees related tattoos. This one is just bad all around. Terrible idea, terrible execution and just poorly done. I would hide this from my friends and neighbors who might be fans themselves. I would be ashamed that I disparaged something I liked so much with absolute shit results.




Now it wouldn't be fair to all those Yankees fans like myself to allow our beloved pinstripers to be defaced in such poor ink fashion. So it's time to retaliate against the Boston Red Sox by exposing what is just utter crap. They took the team logo, which is fine, but the, added matching sweet, sweet tribal. Tribal that is color matched to the logo, absolutely brilliant. What is the point of the tribal? To show how you can make something that much more awesome by putting lines around it? I will never understand the obsession with tribal.




Holy Christ, quite possibly the worst logo reproduction I have ever seen. What this person must have done was found the best blind tattoo artist in the New England region of the United States and just described what this logo looked like. Imagine being proud of this enough to take a photo of it to show to people on the internet.



Ok so another combo of total stupid. Let's take a dragon (a wonderful tattoo cliche) and give him a soccer ball. What the hell, who gives a shit what nonsense you put on your skin. The dragon itself is barely recognizable. I mean is the soccer ball in the dragon's mouth?



Tough guy here thought he would show that playing hockey on broken, melted ice was a way to express his devotion to the game. Is the the hockey man wearing a gas mask? I don't blame him, this friggin thing stinks.



You save the best for last. This is the best. A pink bunny playing basketball. See ya next time...